Dream come true

But in true ‘love hits you when you least expect it’ fashion, Laura put in only minimal effort for their date, and even considered cancelling. “The night we met I’d been at

a painting class all day and I was dirty, I had paint on my hands, I didn’t even bother getting dressed up – no make-up, nothing. It was almost as if I didn’t care anymore. I think a part of me had given up, which makes you unattached to an outcome, but also disinclined to ‘dress every day as if you are going to meet the love of your life’ – as Coco Chanel once said.”

But almost as soon as Laura met Raf she knew he was different from the cynical, disenchanted 40-year-olds she’d been used to dating. “He was cultured, he speaks six languages, knew about music, knew about art, he was a chef, a musician and he had kids. This was an unusual and exceptional person. And even if this didn’t turn into a relationship, I thought this was someone I wouldn’t mind having in my life.”

For Raf, their initial meeting was all the more charged: would Laura be anything like the woman he had dreamed about two nights earlier? “I didn’t want to scare her on our first date with, ‘Hi, I dreamt about you!’ says Raf with a big laugh. And while they certainly hit it off and agreed to meet again, Raf thought maybe he had taken the dream too literally after all.

They continued to see each other and over the coming weeks Raf couldn’t deny something was blossoming between them. Dream or no dream, there was a definite connection, and their mutual likes and dislikes, passions and interests were almost uncanny. As a jazz musician, Raf was particularly impressed by Laura’s knowledge of music. “During one of our first phone conversations, Laura was telling me what she thought of Ken Burns’ Jazz series and I was listening to her with my jaw agape. She was saying things I thought too, and I’ve never heard anybody – especially someone who’s not a musician – articulate, and I thought: ‘Oh my god, this girl! I’ve really got to check this out.’”

Three weeks later, Raf decided to tell Laura about the dream. “I said to her: ‘But in the dream, the woman wore black-rimmed glasses, and you don’t wear glasses.’ And she said, ‘Well, actually, I’ve just started wearing reading glasses at home.’ I asked her what colour and she replied, ‘They’re black.’” It also turned out Laura is a teacher – having taught meditation for 15 years – and her hair is light brown; she colours it to look more red.

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