French kiss

Their relationship may have sprung from sad circumstances, but Olivier Foubert and Nadine Willams’ unexpected love story is an exceptionally romantic one. By Josephine Brouard.

Anyone who thinks mature-age couples don’t hold hands at the movies, kiss tenderly on street corners, make clandestine love on picnic rugs under shady trees, or relish each other’s company from the kitchen to the bed and back again, obviously has not met ‘sexagenarians’ Olivier Foubert and Nadine Williams. Ask the couple if, after three and a half years together, the passion has gone out of their relationship, both look aghast in response. “Absolutely not!” says Nadine, her eyebrows hoisted skywards in shock. She glances at Olivier as coyly as an independent career woman and feminist can muster and waits for her fiancé to speak his mind. “Non, non, not at all,” her paramour responds in mild but firm tones, liberally mixing in a little of his native tongue with the English he is practising more than ever now he and Nadine are an item.

“My goodness, we even hold hands in bed, don’t we dear?” says Nadine. Olivier nods in agreement. Being a dyed-in-the-wool Frenchman, he has absolutely no problem talking about affairs of the heart. Like fine wine and cheese, Olivier seems to think all aspects of love are an essential part of the tapestry of life. He also believes there is a great deal of passion left in his and Nadine’s middle-aged bones. “We still have our disagreements, but there is also a lot of sparkle,” he pronounces in rich French tones. He may have lived in Australia 31 years, many of these as unofficial ‘godfather’ of the French community in Adelaide, but Olivier has definitely not forsaken his French roots. “Nadine and I disagree sometimes, but we have to be together,” he stresses. “If there are no fights, then there is no fire.”

Nadine interjects: “We have cultural clashes about food. He thinks I’m a terrible cook and I still won’t cook a steak anywhere near him. Olivier likes his steak bleu which is the French description for a rare steak. He thinks we Anglo-Saxons have no taste; he’s appalled, for example, when he sees anyone add vegetables to a green salad. He believes a green salad should be accompanied only by a wonderful vinaigrette.”

Olivier, ever mild mannered and softly spoken, listens imperturbably to Nadine’s chatter. It is only when he is pressed to speak that he offers further bon mots for cerebral digestion. Nadine, he explains, is learning to speak French and is getting better all the time, but he admits he occasionally tires of repeating phrases for his chérie. He makes the gesture of a man drawing down window blinds: “I say to Nadine: ‘le rideau est ferme’ [the curtain is closed].”

Nadine laughs merrily, “He’s usually very positive about my French. In fact, he remarked only the other day that I was beginning to sound like an Englishman speaking French rather than an Australian speaking French, so I’m getting closer!” They laugh uproariously at this thought, their hands compulsively creeping towards one another across the dining room table as their eyes lock. Almost imperceptibly, one feels the temperature in the room begin to rise; this is definitely a couple in the throes of mutual admiration.

“Oh yes,” coos Nadine. “Funnily enough, it was when I was working with Olivier in the kitchen that I realised how compatible we are. We complement and support one another in the kitchen; it feels like a real partnership.” Olivier concurs, “From the moment we met, there have been no unilateral decisions. Somehow, we have learned how to agree.”

For Olivier, married at 18 to his childhood sweetheart and widowed 47 years later, the idea of a happy partnership based on mutual affection and respect is really no big deal. However, Nadine came from a completely different background. Twice divorced with two daughters, Serena and Felicia, from the first marriage, and son Tyson from her second marriage, Nadine admits she was a trifle disillusioned after love fizzled out of both marriages. Rearing her children as a single mother, and working full-time in a career she loves passionately, she‘d reached the stage, she admits, where “the last thing I felt I needed was a man”.

But then fate stepped in. In late 2001, Olivier called Nadine in her capacity as cultural issues writer for The Advertiser in Adelaide to discuss the imminent arrival in South Australia of former French President, Michel Rocard, and the possibility of her doing a story on him. A well-known Francophile, Nadine was delighted to interview Michel and subsequently became friendly with Olivier and his bridal designer wife, Colette. “Colette was typically French,” says Nadine, “she was so elegant; always superbly dressed and immaculately coiffed and manicured.” Nadine and Colette became firm friends and it was Nadine who wrote Colette’s obituary when the designer businesswoman died tragically and unexpectedly 18 months later in May 2003.

Olivier was in so much pain he slipped away quietly to France to heal his mind and heart. It was only months later, in late 2003, that he called Nadine to discuss business. Nadine was celebrating the birth of her grandson, Angus, so Olivier suggested a celebratory drink at his home in Adelaide Hills when Nadine had time.

Slowly, over the next few months, a friendship blossomed. Then, as the year drew to a close, Olivier invited Nadine to dinner on New Year’s Eve and the pair toasted the occasion on the stroke of midnight. Friendship fired into lust and, whispering lovely, loving things in her ear, Olivier wooed her. He ran his fingers through Nadine's hair, eased the strap of her black camisole to one side and kissed her neck. He then took Nadine in his arms and kissed her on each cheek, then on her forehead. Finally, he lifted her to her feet and kissed her tenderly on her lips.

“I succumbed to the moment,” says Nadine. “There was no pontificating, no soul-searching, no moralising. We simply never left each other from that first night.” Everyone around them, alas, was horrified, especially Olivier’s children − sons Xavier, Eric and Hervé and daughter Sylvie − who feared their father was acting on the rebound. “The Adelaide French community was sometimes merciless,” adds Nadine.

Olivier suggested a five-week holiday in France so Nadine could meet his family and friends and they could cement their relationship in peace. For Nadine, who loves all things French, this sounded like the holiday of a lifetime. “I was, quite simply, over the moon,” she recollects.

Both Olivier and Nadine say the holiday was wonderful, but it also had its difficult moments. They burst into laughter when they recall what was probably the nadir of their romantic getaway. Olivier and Nadine spent five days with Olivier’s mother, Mamie, and for Nadine it was a less-than-joyous experience. She says Olivier spent most of the five days chatting with his mother in rapid-fire French that Nadine couldn't follow and he could only be prised away from the family hearth with great difficulty. By the time they left Olivier’s childhood home, Nadine was relieved, but also resolved, after days of unpleasant niggling, to rekindle the romance she and Olivier had enjoyed.

That is until Olivier made a bombshell announcement on the exit road from Saint-Rémy, Provence. He was planning to visit Mamie again at the close of their sojourn, he explained, “just to say goodbye”. Nadine announced she would be returning over her dead body. “I’ve had enough, Olivier!” she snapped. Shocked at Nadine's outburst, Olivier retaliated and within minutes, the lovers were at loggerheads. Nadine was demanding to be let out of the car, and white with rage, began walking down the road. As she walked through the Camargue countryside, the awfulness of her situation hit her. She recalls how the tears welled as she began longing to return to the warmth and sunniness of Australia; to her own comfy home; and to the welcoming arms of her family. Olivier was suddenly unutterably foreign to her, and clearly loved his mother more than he loved her. He hadn’t listened to Nadine, and he didn’t understand − or seem to care about − how she felt. After an idyllic week in Paris mooching about like lovers in a Robert Doisneau postcard, events had taken a painful turn. Nadine was heartbroken.

Nadine admits most of the holiday was an incredible buzz; all of Olivier’s friends and family generously proffering hospitality and the sacred gift of acceptance, but they did have to get over quite a few humps nonetheless. Not least of these was the ghost of Colette, whose memory Olivier carries in his heart to this day. “It’s like the death of a child,” he says quietly, “you never forget.” Nadine understands and accepts this fact. She asks Olivier to bring over a photograph of Colette, which she personally retrieved from one of Olivier’s drawers, lying face down, to place above the piano in Olivier’s office. “Olivier doesn’t want to upset me, but I myself admired Colette enormously.” Nadine confides knowingly: “It is possible to love two people at the same time.”

This is a sentiment Olivier’s children have come to acknowledge, too. “I knew I was accepted by his children when Sylvie gave me a few things that once belonged to her mother,” says Nadine. Today, she and Olivier are engaged, their pending union set for January 2008. By then they may have a new home, too. After living with Colette in Adelaide Hills for 27 years, Olivier has accepted it is time to shake off the past. The couple still maintain separate homes, with Olivier regularly visiting his chérie during her working week at her city pied-à-terre.

The award-winning journalist and columnist insists on working because, she says, “I love what I do, and I have a wonderful life.” With an enormous amount in common, including a love of books, music, travel, their pooch Jackson and a handful of grandchildren each, the pair both express heartfelt appreciation for this unexpected chance at love.

Nadine believes relationships are built day by day, by how a man and woman treat each other, how they touch each other, and how they respond to each other. “This man treats me with dignity, respect and love,” she says. “He is a master of all those virtues I told my daughter about when she was getting married. Couples need to listen to each other, to learn from each other, to laugh together and to love each other unconditionally. Olivier and I have done all this… what more could a woman want?” As Olivier lets his chérie’s words sink in, he adds his perspective slowly and thoughtfully. “Nadine has made me come alive again. This is a completely new chapter in the book of my life.”

 

Photography: Sam McAdam. Hair & make-up: David Novak-Piper.