Family planner: busy mum

Busy mum Catherine Lockhart spends a lot of time counting her blessings – all five of them.

Five years ago, 39-year-old Catherine Lockhart was unsure she’d ever be able to have children. She and her husband Peter had been trying, unsuccessfully, for eight years to become pregnant, and finally decided to try IVF. They never dreamed that over the next four years they would be blessed five times. Today Catherine juggles four-year-old Grace, who was the result of their first IVF attempt, three-year-old triplets – Olivia, Stella and Alice – and one-year-old Angus, who was conceived naturally when the couple wasn’t even trying. To say Catherine’s days are full is an understatement, but somehow she’s found a way to spend quality time with her children, run a business, coach other busy mums, teach high school once a week, complete a correspondence course, attend a Pilates class and even fit in the odd golf game.

6am: Catherine’s husband Peter rolls out of bed for his daily jog. He’s careful not to wake any of his five toddlers, but if he does he’ll stay home to entertain them so Catherine can get some well-earned rest. There was a time, not so long ago, when she had no more than two hours sleep at a time. “When the triplets were born, Grace was only 18 months old so our life was a blur of crying, feeding, changing and washing,” she smiles.

When the doctors decided to implant two embryos for the couple’s second IVF attempt, Catherine and Peter prepared for the slim possibility of having twins, but they certainly weren’t prepared for triplets. “My five-week ultrasound showed two heartbeats, but they told us not to get our hopes up as it wasn’t certain that both or even one would survive,” says Catherine. As the weeks went by, she began to worry that her pregnancy didn’t feel ‘right’. “I was losing weight and I just had this idea something was wrong,” she says. When Catherine returned for her 12-week ultrasound she thought her fears had been confirmed when she was told there were no longer two heartbeats. “My heart sank until I heard them say, ‘There’s not two heartbeats; there’s three!’ and we all just started laughing.”

In a rare quirk of nature, one of Catherine’s embryos had split in two, creating identical twins Alice and Stella, who now shared her womb with their sister Olivia. When the three babies arrived, Catherine says she probably wouldn’t have coped had it not been for neighbours, friends, local churches and her children’s grandparents. “Everyone came out of the woodwork to help. People would bring meals around and do loads of washing, and whoever walked through the front door soon had a baby in their arms,” she remembers.

7am: Slowly but surely, the Lockharts’ five-bedroom home begins to fill with the pitter-patter of 10 little feet. It’s not long before the large family room echoes with a happy, high-pitched chatter that reminds Catherine of the fabled ‘Munchkin Land’. “I definitely feel a bit like Dorothy at times,” she laughs. Peter is back from his jog and rounds up the girls to eat breakfast at their own little table, while Catherine gets up and nurses Angus. Training the children to stay at the table during mealtimes has been an important rule in the house. “It hasn’t always been easy, but we persevered and now we can take them to a cafe and we don’t have to worry about them running around or causing chaos,” says Catherine.

7.30am: With breakfast over, it’s time for the girls to change into their day clothes, a task that is surprisingly hassle-free. “The girls all know how to dress themselves,” says Catherine. “I think that’s a legacy of growing up in a big family – you have to become a bit more self-sufficient at a young age because you can’t have Mum and Dad’s attention all the time.” Once they’re dressed, the girls watch cartoons or play, while Peter jumps in the shower before heading off to work as an IT project manager. 

8am: “The kids insist on standing at the door to wave goodbye to Peter,” says Catherine, as she finishes her daily three loads of washing. The washing routine is part of a well-developed schedule that Catherine and Peter use to get through each day. “We’re flexible, but we need it to keep us all on track.”

9am: Today is Monday, so Catherine and the five kids pile into the family’s people mover to take Grace to preschool. Catherine has a large backpack filled with supplies ready to go at all times. “It’s a lifesaver,” she says. As Catherine buckles Angus into his car seat, Grace helps herd the triplets out the door. “Grace is a little mother hen to her sisters and it’s very cute to watch her mimicking me,” says Catherine fondly.

9.10am: Angus and the triplets wave goodbye to their older sister, then Catherine takes them to playgroup. “They love being around other children for a change, and they know how to share and socialise because they’ve always had to wait their turn. They’re not little angels, but they’re pretty good,” laughs Catherine.

11.30am: The family leaves playgroup and Catherine might pop into the local shops with the children in the spectacular four-seater pram. “Sometimes they all want to get out and walk, so we had to do a few training sessions to make sure they knew to hold on to the pram and not run away,” says Catherine.

12.30pm: The family arrives home and the girls run out to play in the backyard, while Catherine watches from the kitchen, entertains Angus and prepares lunch. “Peter has made the backyard magical. He built a little fairy garden, a cubby house and a swing set, so there’s plenty to keep them busy,” she says. Twenty minutes later, Catherine calls everyone to the table. This time, Angus sits with his sisters so he too can get used to the family tradition. “He loves sitting with the girls and they all coo over him and giggle at his baby talk,” says Catherine.

1.30pm: After lunch it’s time for an afternoon nap and the girls happily head into their bedroom. However, it wasn’t always like this. “When the girls were a year old we went to a Tresillian Family Care Centre to learn how to get them all to sleep at the same time with self-settling – it really helped us not to stress so much.”

Once Angus and the girls are ‘down’, Catherine will prepare the ingredients for that night’s dinner. “I try to get as much done as I can during the day, so I’m not rushing around at dinnertime when everyone’s hungry,” she says, “and I plan the week’s meals.”

This is also when Catherine will check her emails or do some housework. On Thursdays and Fridays she employs a nanny as she teaches high school, or takes calls from clients for whom she works as a life coach. As a volunteer representative for the Australian Multiple Birth Association, Catherine also counsels other mums with twins or triplets. “I know I sound like I’ve bitten off more than I can chew, but helping other mums and working as a life coach actually helps keep me sane. Running a household is one of the most difficult and emotionally draining tasks, but when you become a mum you don’t have to give up your goals, and that’s what I’d like to help other women understand.” 

2.50pm: One by one the children wake, then it’s time for an afternoon snack and some organised play. While the children get along well and are usually well behaved, they each have the occasional tantrum. “I try to remove whoever’s having a ‘moment’ because if one gets stressed another one will start and they’ll all be crying for my attention,” explains Catherine. “We have a chair in the other room where they go if they play up. It can be quite cute because the others will often go in to comfort whoever’s in there.”

3.15pm: Catherine’s business partner Gillian Cornwell has kindly collected Grace from preschool and arrives with her children, Jack and Lucy, for a quick meeting while the kids play. The pair started a company, Busy Mothers, last year and have launched The Busy Mothers Companion – a bound folder filled with information, tips and tools to help mums manage their lives. “A book might tell you to create a schedule, but The Companion has templates, so all you have to do is fill in the gaps,” says Catherine.

“Managing a household and making sure everyone – including you – is happy isn’t easy. Nobody shows you what to do, but this makes it all that bit easier,” Gillian adds.  

5pm: When the children begin to tire, Gillian heads home with her two and Catherine starts dinner before Peter comes home. “Peter rings the doorbell and the kids run and hide,” explains Catherine. As he finds each one, he gives them a cuddle. “It’s a lovely way for them to get Dad all to themselves for a few moments each day,” she says.

For more information on The Busy Mothers Companion or life coaching, visit www.busymothers.com.au.

Words: Linda Peatling. Photography: Andrew Lehmann. Hair & make-up: David Novak-Piper.